11:21 PM - <3 .
i got back with sam that night. I hated myself so much, it just all came down, and i let hunter talk to me and try to analize my life, when i should have been doing it myself. anyways i walked to his house, so i could tell him how sorry i was, and how i wanted him to take me back and just be with him again, but he never came outside, and i guess i get that.. he was sad and didnt want to see me. he wishes he did now though so my little cutsiee happy ending didnt work haha but then later that night when i got back home i talked to him on aim and we worked it out. haha he just siad "god damnit michelle" and i thought it was funny =) and then it was like nothing happened but a bad dream, that wasnt completly bad because it made me realize how much i love him, and how good he is to me. i dont even remeber what i did over the weekend,
oh i slept over richards with rose and omar, it was fun. Hunter was all im not going to come and wanted omar to hang with him, but im glad omar came with us even though he felt bad for somewhat ditching but hunter could have come to richards too.. he just didnt want to. I made him mad, by getting back with sam, but i honestly dont care sure i want hunter to be happy i think he deserves someone, it just wont be me:). anyways i think hes all mad, one because i went back with sam and two because here he goes and tried to analize the situation agian but he can pretty much convince himself of whatever he wants, when he really just needs to stop thinking and feel. just feel . and has convinced himself im going to avoid him because i dotn want to like him or somthing. but thats not it. i am not avoiding him at all.. i cant stop from feeling whatever i want to feel.. i dont think i will like them agian and if i do ill know its just because i am spending so much time with them, but ill also know not to freek out and lose sam over it. becausee i like sam so much more.
I dropped any feelings i had for anyone other then sam, once he was gone and it was like the thought of never being able to talk to him or even be his friend was like just shoot me now, or somthing along the lines of that.
SO richards was fun, we were all really tired though so we didnt do much. Saturday i totally went home to my sims, wich i have been hooked on agian. i played me and sams family, our child has grown up and is now in college. haha
sunday i got to hang out with sam a little. :) it was fun that was the first i got to see him since i got all retarded. we snuggled a bit in his room and then we went for an adventure to find some cake for our friend shane, hes a nice kid. WE eventually found some because my dad was driving by and new i was at rite aid so he stopped and took us to the dollar general were we made our selection, and then went back to sams and snuggled. i could just lay with him and not do anything for hours. its nice. then we made the cake, with some white icing, and sam left for his band practice, he had show on saturday i didnt go though . shane liked his cake, and it actually tasted pretty good.
then today was fun too. i had sam come over that morning :) and then vittoria came over later and then we made a stop motion video with stuffed animals, it was silly. then we dressed up a little, and then we met up with sam and hunter Pernell. It has been forever since i have seen hunter p. i missed him so it was nice, i hope to see him more often this time. we all went to the park it was pretty cold. it just bothered me at one point when we were playing around and i just liek tapped her face and she like beat me with her wrist. >.> like to where it hurt.. and still does even if im bein a pansy somtimes shes to rough and its.. like .. jeeze chill out.
the park was lots of fun i was just kinda free i felt nice doing whatever i pleased without nagging or anything i like being outside. like this one soccer no one picked me up but an hour later and i just layed in the grass, and it was so nice, so relaxing. i didnt know just laying there could be so wonderful. anyways i went over to the lil slide thing and hunter and sam were on the swings talking and it was so cute it was like a little movie and i was watching it, and .. then in the other picture was vittoria and jaysen being all over eachother. so i layed there but then i was paranoid about spiders.. haha i dont like spiders at all. so i got up and went over to lil sam . and then they went to the bench so i was like.. okeeh .? but then the swing was open! so i swung and swung and felt wonderful and free and refreshed and i went where ever the swing carried me.
vittoria and jaysen fell off there swing by now, and now where "one with the sand" anyways eventually i went over to sam and hunter agian and sam put his arm around me and we all talked a while and it was fun i missed hunter p alot, i missed sam too even though i had seen him earlier that day . im home now obviosly.. however vittoria and jaysen are still outside in the sand.. and im a little sleepy... in other words i kinda wanna sleep but i cant do that because i have to unlock the door when she gets here, and i wont leave the door unlocked because there has been some break ins . i dont mind that she wants to be with jaysen or cuddle its just the complete neglection. while she can go do whatever with her boy toys im always stuck as entertainment, or like a distraction for whomever, i just think its also wrong how she treats omar. i mean he's such a great kid, he doesnt deserve this, ok so you dont like somone any more.. thats nice really it is. but could you be any more heartless. pleasee take a look at yourself. Whatever though, she can do what she wants.. well its not like she was really looking for approval in the first place.
Atleast i have sams jacket hehe, i stole it, it helps me sleep. :)
music: Playradioplay