How a guy can be a Jerk

so Im back for the 2nd time today. Usually I love to come and spend time with my kids and their dad but this time all I wanna do is go home. Dont get me wrong I love my kids but I cant stand being with their dad. I wish they would sleep in Bullhead so I didnt have to spend time in Vegas with him. He spends so much time on his phone and hardly any with the kids while Im here. He uses me being here as an excuse to not do anything for the kids. I still love him and he knows how I feel and yet he rubs it in my face that hes hooking up with someone new. It irritates me cause he knows that theres nothing I wouldnt do to be back with him. I wish I could move on and find someone but thats kinda hard when I still have such strong feelings for him. I jus wish I could go back in time to when all was great between us. He doesnt know that I cry myself to sleep some nights cause of how much he hurts me. I know that after a year he shouldnt still have this affect on me but he does and I dont know what to do to change that, especially cause even though we got a divorce we've been sleepin together and now he tells me hes pursuing someone Why cant I find someone who cares about the way I feel and will help me get over this jackass? I give up maybe Ill jus get a dog and be done with guys