It Seems to be All in Vain

I have been praying, crying, trying and begging to get closer to home. I just had 2 friends be given positions I'd expressed interest in. I have a boss that sees me as weak and intimidated and won't say shit to my face about it. I'm so pissed off by it all that I can barely stay on task. I have so much anger inside I can't see straight. I'm just about ready to say, "Fuck it all."

I've done everything in my power to change things. I do what I'm told and don't question, but still am getting this. I can't do it any more. I'm done. I'm over it and there's not a damned person I can talk to about it wholeheartedly. Our commissioner or asst. comm. is coming soon with lots of questions about job satisfaction. My question is: "Do I tell the truth? or Do I lie?"

If I say anything and the wrong people find out then my life could be more hellish here than it already is. If I don't then it continues status quo and I seethe in anger. I've prayed about it. I've cried about it and talked about it. I want to bulldoze this obstacle and can't seem to no matter how hard I try. I guess I'll just keep plugging along until either I break or something gives. I pray for the latter and not the former.